5 Creepy Movies That Show What It’s Like to Date a Narcissist

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) means that a person is selfish to such an extreme it is considered pathological (caused by a mental illness). Colloquially, many people are called narcissists for a less severe degree of selfishness due to hyperbole. Dating a narcissist can be traumatizing, especially since one hallmark is gaslighting, which renders the victim unable to differentiate between what is normal and what crosses the line into abuse.

While these films are extreme portrayals of narcissists (because the vast majority of narcissists aren’t murderers), they will be familiar (and hopefully provide catharsis) for people who have dated one in real life.

Badlands (1973)

Terrence Malick’s directorial debut was this neo-noir crime drama following a Korean war veteran turned garbage man, Kit (Martin Sheen). Kit seduces a 15-year-old high school student (Sissy Spacek) and murders her father when he disapproves. The two fake their deaths and take off, hoping to evade captures. While incredibly charming when he wants to be, privately Kit is anti-social. Throughout the film he murders ruthlessly and recklessly while going on monologues about the way he sees things.

The Shining (1980)

A major source of contention regarding Stanley Kubrick’s horror film The Shining is that in the source material, Stephen King had written a story about a more or less average man who is driven to madness by cabin fever. In Kubrick’s adaptation, Jack Torrance (Jack Nicholson) is a narcissist whose ego makes him an easy target for the malevolent spirits of the Overlook Hotel to manipulate. This distinction isn’t a big deal as both King’s novel and Kubrick’s film are enduring favorites for horror fans, but audiences who wish to see a frightening portrayal of a narcissist will want to do a thorough watch of The Shining (1980). An especially memorable display of narcissism occurs during the infamous “bat scene” when Jack becomes unhinged and violent after his wife Wendy (Shelley Duvall) discovers all the work Jack has been doing on his novel amounts to his typing “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” across hundreds of sheets of paper. This marks the moment when Jack’s narcissism goes from covert (can’t put your finger on it) to overt (verifiable).

Sleeping with the Enemy (1991)

A psychological thriller about a relationship that seems perfect on the outside. Sara (Julia Roberts) is the stay-at-home wife of a wealthy investment counselor, Martin (Patrick Bergin), who is publicly charming and privately obsessive and abusive. He routinely berates and beats Sara over small infractions before continuing the cycle of narcissistic abuse by love-bombing her with apologies and affection. Sara works out an elaborate plan to fake her death at sea and escape to start a new life in Iowa, near her elderly mother. Martin’s ego is too big to allow Sara to leave him and he ruthlessly hunts her down.

Fear (1996)

A psychological thriller that stars Mark Wahlberg as narcissist David McCall. 16-year-old Nicole Walker (Reese Witherspoon) is seduced by his charm despite her father’s immediate dislike of him. As soon as Nicole falls for David he reveals himself to be controlling and violent, and isolates her by turning Nicole against her father (William Petersen). When Nicole tries to leave David, he stages a violent home invasion at the Walker house during which he intends to kill Nicole’s entire family (including her dog) so that he can have her for himself.

The Invisible Man (2020)

A sci-fi horror movie inspired by the H.G. Wells novel of the same name. Elisabeth Moss stars as Cecilia, the victim of a violent and abusive engineer and businessman, Adrian (Oliver Jackson-Cohen). After Cecilia escapes from the home she shared with Adrian, he reportedly dies by suicide. However, Cecilia is unable to shake her gut feeling that he is stalking her. Even as the stalking progresses from a feeling to observable evidence (ex: a hand print left in the fog during a shower) Cecilia is not believed. This is a familiar plot in horror history: the dynamics of abuse and whether people believe victims is allegorically addressed throughout the genre. A good case study on this is the “based on a true story” horror movie The Entity (1982). In The Invisible Man, it turns out that Adrian’s engineering ability allowed him to create a body suit which renders him invisible, and able to torment Cecilia at his leisure.

More movies about narcissists:

• The Bad Seed (1956) explores the “nature vs. nurture” argument through the lens of narcissistic (and worse) 8-year-old Rhoda Penmark (Patty McCormack).
• Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962) Bette Davis plays a narcissistic former child star, “Baby” Jane Hudson, who lives with her disabled sister Blanche (Joan Crawford).
• Mommie Dearest (1981) a biographical psychological drama (and accidental cult classic comedy) about real life narcissistic mother Joan Crawford (played by Faye Dunaway) that was adapted from her daughter Christina’s autobiography.
• Cape Fear (1991) the abusive and narcissistic character Max Cady was so scary that actor Robert De Niro would frighten director Martin Scorsese by leaving him voicemails in character.
• Matilda (1996) poor precocious 6-year-old Matilda (Mara Wilson) is raised by a narcissistic father and mother (Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman).
• No One Would Tell (1996) teen star Fred Savage played against type as an abusive narcissistic boyfriend to high school student Stacy (Candace Cameron Bure).
• Scream (1996) writer Kevin Williamson has said he sees killer Billy Loomis (Skeet Ulrich) as a narcissist who brought Stu Macher (Matthew Lillard) into his murder plot by manipulating Stu’s romantic interest in Billy.
• Black Swan (2010) a ballerina’s narcissistic mother (Barbara Hershey) adds to her mental deterioration as she takes on a difficult role.
• Mother! (2017) a woman’s narcissistic husband asks her to take on more and more without regard to her wellbeing.
• Sharp Objects (2018) a troubled woman returns home to stay with her narcissistic mother and younger sister in this miniseries based on the Gillian Flynn novel.
• Dirty John (2018) the first season of this television series based on true crime stories tells the bonkers story of real life covert narcissist John Meehan.
• The Undoing (2020) a murder mystery miniseries about a covert narcissist.
• Alice, Darling (2022) Anna Kendrick stars as a woman trying to break free from her narcissistic boyfriend.
• Resurrection (2022) a narcissistic abuser (Tim Roth) shows up to torment the woman who escaped him (Rebecca Hall).